Monday, August 22, 2011

Half Past Summer

I can't believe that summer is almost over.  While I did spend most of the summer recuperating, it seems like there is just no time left to accomplish anything else this summer.  We did get away last week to the beach with quite a few friends and had a great time.  I couldn't really go in the pool water as I still have stitches and my doc gave me the ratio of pool water/chemicals vs. pee...and it wasn't a good ratio.  So, I had orders to go in the pool only up to my waist.  The ocean water was actually the more preferable option.  However, the surf was very rough and the jellyfish were present, so I didn't go in too far there either.  I also had orders to stay out of the sun since the Herceptin and the Bactrim (for infection) I am on are medications that make the skin more susceptible to sunburn.  The weather, for me, cooperated, and thankfully not every day was full of sun.  Even when it was, the air was a little cooler than it has been.  I found it to be just right for me...and glad it was so!

We got back a couple days ago and then met up with some relatives for a BBQ.  It was good to see family and share all that's been going on in our lives.  We are not the only ones with some craziness going on, and it was even good to share our stories.  

Went back to plastic surgeon's office today.  That dreaded red area is still there, but still no worse, no better.  I saw my regular surgeon's partner (since my guy is away), and he told me that it is just possible that it may never go away.  It is good it is not getting worse, however.  He also said that they will be going very slowly on the inflation, and will probably not get me to anymore than a "B" cup....which is just sooooo fine for me!  I was not looking to be the next Dolly Parton, and just wanted "enough padding" to feel feminine.  The size really didn't (and doesn't) matter.  But I was glad he shared this and that it confirmed what I was already thinnking.

The next appointment is this Friday for another Herceptin treatment.  After this one, I believe my oncologist will be sending me for another Muga Scan since the heart ejection factor needs to be addressed and watched as I am on this medication.  I don't need to see my plastic surgeon for another two weeks (they said slow...they mean slow) since they don't want to do anything to jeopardize the precariousness of the "red spot". 

A few weeks ago, I went to the "kick-off" breakfast for the "Making Strides Against Breast Cancer" walk on October 16th which I am taking part in and someone there tapped me on the shoulder.  When I turned around, it was, of all people, my breast surgeon!  It was good to see her (her medical group is one of the supporters of this walk), and she reminded me that I am overdue to see her.  Of course, with all the others looking at me, I forgot she wanted "a look" also.  So, I need to make an appointment with her soon also.  Then, it is back to my internist and I need to see my gyno.  Doctors are just going to be a part of the continuous landscape anymore.

For now, I am glad to be feeling a little stronger, have more energy, be able to wear a "sports bra", and to know the worst is now behind me (I hope).  My husband and I were looking at our fall schedule the other day and realized that we could actually start making plans here and there for different events/activities.  It does indeed feel good to be able to get back to life.

This doesn't mean that I think things are done.  I know they will never "be done" anymore.  There will always be more and more checking and watching.  You never know what could "pop up" here and there.  And it doesn't mean that the implants feel entirely comfortable or "normal".  They don't...not yet.  Plus, my back is still numb and under my arms is still somewhat swollen and my chest feels "tight" and sometimes more uncomfortable than other times.  I am told that it will take quite a while before I feel even near "normal".  But I will take this present time as a gift from God and as the most normal concentration of time I have had in a good long while.  I look forward now to the fall and holidays and the walk and celebrating just how far I've come.

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