Is It Hot In Here?

So, first, the counts.  When she came back into the room with the results, she said, "Well, the counts are a little low..." and my heart sank.  But she continued with, "But a safe low.  They should pick right up by the weekend."  WHEW!  Who knew there was a SAFE low???  But, I'll take it!  Backache still here, but since I know that is good news, it's OK.  I can have my chemo on Tuesday, so thankfully I should be "good" for Thanksgiving.  

The hot flashes are back in my life again (at least menopause was good for something...years of hot flash experience) and I am sure they are aggravated by the wig when I wear it! I do now understand why most women who have this particular type of chemo and lose their hair don't wear their wigs all the time.  THEY ARE HOT AND ITCHY!  I have put a small fan on my desk so that it blows some cool air my way which helps during work.  I don't want to make the kids or parents uncomfortable during preschool, so I wear the wig for most of the day.  But by the time it is about 2 or 3 PM, I have to tear it off and wear something else.

I have become fond of those "newsboy hats" and went over to K-Mart (yes, I shop there but I have yet to find that "blue light special" man anywhere) and picked up about five for $6.99 each so I'm set.  I tried scarves, but I just feel like an old woman in them or like someone from Lucy and Ethel's time when women would wear them to clean the house.  But, the hats I like...it's me!

My husband is still getting used to me going out in just the hat.  I am slowly getting used to it since it is much cooler and easier.  Although I admit to actually taking brown eyeliner and "filling in" some short sideburns (not Elvis sideburns, just wispy ones) so it looks even more "normal".   Having the wig gives security and I will definitely use it for certain social occasions and during work, but I am glad to have an alternative as well.  Again, at home, it's just my bald head and me walking in the breeze.

So, Tuesday is chemo number 3 and then one more to go with the "red devil".  The crazy thing is...I am now used to the rhythm of this chemo and how I will feel.  I am already thinking (I know I said I wouldn't look ahead, but I peeked at it today) about how the next drug, Taxol, will affect me in terms of side effects.  Reading about it is difficult, but I have to remember the "red devil" information was equally as startling and I am doing OK.

Meanwhile, I keep opening windows when the flashes come and I am driving my husband crazy...or I think the correct term is "crazier".  But, as I said, he lived with it once before, so we'll get through it again.  Thank God it is fall/winter!  I can't imagine going through this in the summer.   I have a hard enough time with heat as it is.

So, in answer to the question up top....I guess it's not hot in here, just hot inside my own body!  But hey....this may be the only time I can effectively call myself "Hot!"  

Thanks for reading.  Comments are always welcome.